Letters to my beloved 2- I made a friend

Dear beloved,
          I was down and broken when you left , without a goodbye or good riddance but I made a friend . He was wild and free spirited ,he was kind and caring , he was wise and smart ,he was introverted with moderate social skills. But all these qualities are never constant and like the clock that changes it's hand every passing hour , I saw a new version of him . But what never changes was his listening ear . He listened to my frustration , he listened to my insecurities ,he listened to my senseless ranting, he listened to my pittyful cries , he listened to my everything. But he was equally disturbed and I couldn't wrap my head around it . Why be so happy , why be so free ,why be so wild , when you're still going to loose all of it .
       Under the Almond trees we would sit and talk for hours , From life to death to sexuality to relationships , we'll go on and on , most times, retiring at dusk . I felt safe , his exuberant aura consumed me and to a great extent , I was alive again , ready to live  , ready to explore but I'll still seldomly question it all , question the use of existence, question why the sun is the sun, question why the sea is blue and all the silly little things then I'll rant to my friend , complaining and complaining.
   Yet another day ,the sun in it's radiant goodness kept watch and there I was complaining , my Friend asked me "why to you complaining" , I felt judged, my safe haven had just crumbled . "It's because of all the shitty things I go through" I replied . "Other people have it worse" he said. "I'm dying , I have an incurable disease , not much time is left  " he said again , his voice shaking. My heart melted. "Life is beautiful ;live, love , feel . Don't let the past hold you down . Don't wallow in self pity , enjoy every single minute , explore new possibilities , have an open mind and love genuinely and most of all be happy " he went on. I still couldn't wrap my head around it . And like a dam about to crumble, my eyes were filled with tears , I couldn't utter a single word. He look at me and said " at the end of it all , you'll be fine " he got up and left and I never saw him again.
   Our friendship was short lived and I sometimes wonder how he would have eventually passed and wished he was in a better place. the thought of me loosing every good thing in my life would make wonder if I was cursed . But I'll still hold his words close . Most of all be happy
                                              You're faithfully
                                                    A.G.E